maran_z (maran_z) wrote in badbadzimfics,

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Summertime By Alexi Kiev

Dear goodness, this fic is one painful mess of nonsense and Capitol Letters.

I Sat On The Lawn Chair. Because Capitolizing Every Frickin' Word Is Fun. I Had Broken My leg And Red Refused To let Me Stand. Right...Who the crap is narrating? I Did Mange To Convice Red To Let Me Outside. So Here I Am. Watching Others Play While I’m Stuck On This God Darm Chair. Darmmit! Though I Had Red On A Really Tight Leash. That's an interesting image.

Alice Was Once Again Sitting Alone On The Pool Ladder. I Have have no idea who Alice is either. Her Smiles And laughs Were 100 Fake But Nobody Ever Seemed To Openly Question Her. Purple Eyed Alice. Being Himself, He Pushed Her In. The Poor Girl. She Got Out Of The Pool And Run Inside The House. Nobody Seemed To Notice. Okay...Why are the Tallest near a pool? With two random girls?

But As Always, Yueh Got Mad. Oh goody, another fancharacter. Yueh And Purple Had A Yelling Match. Nobody Was On Purple’s Side. And Purple sure was glad that Nobody stuck up for him, because Nobody was a darm good debater. Raven Stayed Out Of It. Help control the character population: have your character spayed or neutered. He Sat On The Deck With An Umpira A what...? Over His Head. He Was A Vampire And Elf Mix, So he Burned Very Easily. Oh jeez...I don't even have a witty, biting comment for that one. I had Hopped Kristin Would Have Gone After Her But Saddly She Didn’t. Not Sure Why Not.

Night Fell. Somebody Has Challanged The Elves To A dance Match. It Was In Good Sport, So The Elves Acppted. Seth Had Managed To Convice Alice To Sing. Her Song Stuck A Cord Inside kristin And Me. So Now Everyone Thinks We’re Into Love. Hell No, Atlease For Me.

if you hold my hand i promise to take you along...Didn't it occur to the author to take some of the excess capitol letters above and give them to these song lyrics? my dreams are yours too! don't worry..don't fear angel i'll always sing for you..i'll be your little mocking songs carrie you away,like a flying carpet! take me with you...i beg you..don't grow so fast! your nothing but a child...

The lyrics go on for two good sized paragraphs. Jeez Louise.

I counted five original characters, six if you count the "I." That's a lot for four paragraphs.
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WOW. There are more lyrics than original writing in that. I think she's going for creating a "mood" with the whole observation of things unexplained, but it's just confusing and annoying. Especially with the capitalizations. And the billyunz of fancharacters. :p